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  • Carina Viljoen

Divine Feminine Healing

Updated: Mar 29

Healing my Twin Flame Union


"There are two polarities in Twin Flames and you are either one or the other. You are either 100 percent masculine at your core, or you are 100 percent feminine at your core. These two energies are static in that they remain as this polarity for all of eternity from the moment of your creation."

- "Twin Flames: Finding Your Ultimate Lover" by Jeff & Shaleia


With the recent revelations in our Twin Flames Universe community and the new Harmonious Twin Flame Unions that are same sex couples, a lot of things began moving into my awareness for healing, especially around Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine healing. I've always thought I am the DF in my Twin Flame Union, and it seems natural because I'm in a woman's body. However, many in our community have recently realised that they are a different polarity at their core to the body they have incarnated in. Almost immediately as this was revealed, I began looking at my life and considered "What if I have been a DM all along?" I noticed a lot of things would logically make sense, and that kinda scared me.


Like, for example, how when I first started salsa dancing a few years ago, I was very insistent on leading. I hated that men were the ones leading women, and thought it was very sexist. Through doing salsa dancing intensively for a full year, advancing to quite a level, attending a festival and even competing, I was able to relax into being led, but it was something I did begrudgingly for the most part.


Or the fact that I pursued a career in Software Engineering for 10 years. I worked my butt off, never feeling quite up to scratch (imposter syndrome) and dealing with a lot of unfair and gendered treatment in the industry. I started affinity groups and mentoring for other women in tech, and despite the challenges, managed to become quite mastered and adept in my field. There were times I felt like I had to be one of the guys, and even better than all my male peers to be respected. I never wanted to be seen as a "diversity hire".


Or consider that although I've exclusively dated and been attracted to men, I've had very few romantic relationships. The longest one had been with an abusive ex where we struggled to have intimacy for years.


All of this (and more I won't go into here) came up for healing and release the past few days. As each of these thoughts or memories was presented to me, I had the option of resisting and numbing out, or just being present with myself. I continued loving myself through each feeling and upset using the Mirror Exercise as taught by Jeff and Shaleia in their book, intent only on accepting myself and finding the truth within.


As I felt through each feeling, I began to feel lighter and lighter, and finally last night in my coaching session with my Ascension Coach, I was able to release another layer and come to a deeper knowing of being a Divine Feminine. More than that, I felt I was actually able to embrace it and find joy in who I am, not in the ideas or identities of being a woman that I had built up within, but had felt so very damn heavy to me. My coach helped me release any masculinity I may have been holding onto still. Last night I didn't just relax into being a woman, I felt grateful for it, for the first time in a very long time. I wasn't angry or pissed at men or my DM anymore. As I surrendered into the innocent joy of who I am, I felt expansive peace within. There was a sweet synch where my coach's daughter even giggled in the background at one point, reminding me of the innocence of being God's beloved daughter.


"The feminine energy is a receiving, abundantly overflowing energy. She desires to receive the masculine and encourages the masculine to give more. The more the masculine gives, the more she overflows into him, thus energizing him."

- "Twin Flames: Finding Your Ultimate Lover" by Jeff & Shaleia


I could see how I actually had never wanted to be led in salsa dancing, I just desired a competent partner I could trust, and that the moments of dancing I enjoyed the most were when the male lead allowed me to shine and guided me in a loving way, and that God has always been lovingly guiding me in the dance of life. I enjoyed my tech career because I loved learning and being challenged, and my gender had nothing to do with that. Toward the end of it, I had not resorted to being one of the guys to succeed; I had just been myself and been damn committed and good at my job (until it was time to pursue my Life Purpose), and I was always an asset. And the previous relationships I was in didn't work out because I wasn't with my Twin Flame and equipped with Jeff and Shaleia's work to succeed. The truth is I am my Twin Flame's perfect wife, and that's how God created me to be. The truth is simple, but we have to allow the logic to surface after we find peace and clarity within, not try and retrofit the logic and bypass loving ourselves.


The past few days as all of this was releasing, my face began to look very masculine to me, and that kinda scared me. But I chose to surrender and just love myself unconditionally. This morning as I looked in the mirror, I could just see my femininity reflected back to me, and it felt very peaceful and good. It never makes sense to judge the upsets as they arise. Even if they don't look like it at first, they are always a gift, as Jeff and Shaleia have always taught us. You don't need to accept the story as it's presented to you, but avoiding going into the feelings is just pushing love away, and love is all you actually want.


I'm incredibly grateful to the latest Unions in our community for their courage, honesty and openness in sharing their healing with all of us, encouraging and inspiring us to love ourselves even deeper.


"Choose to honor yourself completely and there you will always find love."

- "Twin Flames: Finding Your Ultimate Lover" by Jeff & Shaleia



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