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  • Writer's pictureCarina V

Creating balance with inner work

If you're choosing to do spiritual or inner work as part of your Twin Flame journey, it is important to create balance and to honour your natural and compassionate pace. When doing inner work, your awareness will continue to expand, and you might notice more areas that you would like to work on. It is essential to take it a step at a time. Your pace is unique to you, and there is no need to compare yourself to anyone else.

Doing inner work is comprised of different parts, with the healing encompassing the whole cycle, not just the active work on your own consciousness. A part of doing inner work is also allowing the healing you're doing to integrate and ground into your being so that you fully embody the transformation taking place. Every new choice you make has a ripple effect on your life; you may notice some emotions coming up for release, or even some signs of physical upheaval in your life too when embracing change actively. These changes may also be reflecting in your relationship with your Twin Flame, so it is important to hold space for these changes to take place.

What is actually happening?

When these periods of upheaval or integration feel intense, they are sometimes labeled an "ego death" or a "dark night of the soul". It is a form of spiritual or emotional detox, a way of releasing and letting go of the old emotions and feelings to make room for what you are calling into your life. Think of a caterpillar entering the cocoon and emerging as a butterfly. You can see it like a form of emotional or spiritual spring cleaning, a purging of whatever is no longer in alignment with the life you are consciously choosing to build for yourself. It does not need to be a dramatic or painful experience, but notice if you do feel that it is.

By bringing about a change in our outlook toward things and events, all phenomena can become sources of happiness. - Dalai Lama

There is no need to judge whatever is coming up for release. Be compassionate with yourself. Remember that these are the things you are now letting go of, and neither your feelings nor your past actions define you. The more you can practice not resisting or attaching to whatever is being released the easier it will be to integrate. It can help a great deal to focus on what you are calling in and to be grateful for the lessons you have learned which enable you to now release what no longer serves you.

What can I do during these periods of integration?

Finding ways to support yourself during these times of upheaval or integration is important. It ensures that you feel nurtured and cared for while emotionally processing and also provides you with the foundation and stamina needed to keep going. It is not generally recommended to undertake more intense spiritual or inner work when in a space of deep integration or upheaval. Patience is a guaranteed way to make progress faster, but burning yourself out does not speed up progress in the long run.

Some activities that can support you during integration:

  • Spending time grounding in nature

  • Giving space for your emotions through meditation

  • Listening to music

  • Watching your favourite show or movie

  • Cleaning out your physical space or smudging

  • Connecting with loved ones

  • Journalling

  • Taking a nap or other forms of rest

  • Doing a workout to support the energetic release

  • Drinking a warm beverage or having a snack

  • Taking a shower or bath

  • Playing a game

  • Doing something creative

  • Planning and taking a trip somewhere

  • Other self care activities like having a massage

You might like to try one of my meditations from this playlist on YouTube.

If you recognise your Twin Flame is going through one of these periods of integration or upheaval, you can offer support to them by holding space for them, encouraging them and reassuring them. It is not your job to process things for them emotionally, but you can be there for them as their partner and love them unconditionally through their healing process. Remember that supporting another can't come at the expense of you supporting yourself first, so don't neglect yourself and your own needs.

It is not recommended to make any big life changes or decisions when in the middle of upheaval. Give yourself the space to really process what is going on without moving from a space of reaction.

Be supported

If the integration feels very intense, be sure to reach out for support to trusted channels. Remember that even the worst storms do pass, and so will this. And even though this path is ours to walk, we are not meant to do so on our own. We are all in this together, collectively.

If you would like personal support on your Twin Flame journey, you might consider working with me.

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